Black Friday. The true meaning of Christmas.

It’s good to know the true spirit of Christmas is alive and well in the form of Black Friday. The day after Americans give thanks, countless people queue up outside shops in the wee small hours waiting to snap up stuff at bargain basement prices.

Gives you the warm fuzzies doesn’t it?

What could be more heartwarming than witnessing herds of people clambering over one another to grab at cut-price TVs?

How could you not smile at the sight of someone being knocked to the ground in the crush and no-one rushing to their aid? After all, it’s surely more important to get your hands on more sh*t you don’t need than to help someone, isn’t it?

And after it all, when the big stores are counting all their money, all the shoppers will have lots of extra credit card debt. Won’t that be lovely for them?

Black Friday. Because without consumers, Christmas would be nothing.

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